Happy Mayan Apocalypse!

We here at Gas House Gorillas have been rather troubled as of late. You see, Boys & Girls...we just happen to believe in a little thing called tradition. Yeah, that's right...he's going there.
Rampant commercialism has tainted my beloved holiday with flashy images of a fat man in red pajamas and glowing plastic reindeer spewing their snow covered propaganda to a dumbed down constituancy, too dulled on Devil Dogs, cheese and grape soda to care.
Free toys for all you say?
Sounds like a little thing called Socialism to me.
I'll purchase my own toys, thankyouverymuch.
Every year the holiday season comes and goes and yours truly just keeps his mouth shut. "Don't make waves." I tell myself, "It's not that big a deal."
Well it is to me!
Where may one find true holiday spirit, Mr. Scrooge?
Where must one go, for a return to the holiday cheer that once made this nation great?
Can it be found at a parade?
No, you numbskull.
At a festive family gathering perhaps?
Are you high?
No, Tiny Tim...there is only one place to find the real meaning of the holiday.
The Blue Comet...
(wait for it)
Word is that Santa will have a gift for you.
It's a toys for tots drive, Virginia.
So bring an unopened toy for a kid who needs one and stop being such a cranky-pants for once.

Sunday, December 23
6:00 pm
The Blue Comet
106 S. Easton Rd.
Glenside, PA

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